For most men. Getting a girl to agree to go out dating with you is, unfortunately, not as simple as just asking.

And even when you’ve detected a spark of chemistry between the two of you, there are still ways of asking that can get her to turn you down. To keep that from happening, and have the best chances of all the women you ask out on a date saying, “Yes”, just follow these 3 time-tested and proven tidbits of ages-old wisdom:

Downplay It

To a typical guy, a date is not a huge ordeal. It’s a casual opportunity to get to know a girl better, see if there’s any chemistry, try and have a good time together. For a typical girl, however, a date is a huge ordeal. It’s an opportunity to explore the possibility of becoming a couple, the potential start of a long and hopefully wonderful relationship.

Put another way, to a man, a date is just a date. To a woman, a date is either a beginning or an end. So a woman is prone to fret about a date much more than a man, to question if this man is the right man to start something with, to wonder if she’s doing the right thing in saying “Yes”.

There’s not much you can do to change how a woman views dating. But you can minimize this tendency by not making a bigger deal of it than necessary. Play it down. Don’t act too serious about it. Be low-key and light-hearted about it.

Don’t make it seem like her saying “Yes” is the end-all and be-all of everything to you too. Because that is simply too much pressure for a woman to deal with, especially when she doesn’t even know you very well yet and doesn’t have any of herself invested in you yet. And that’s why she’s always more prone to say “No”.

Instead make it sound like dating is a common, everyday occurrence for you. Like you’ve already got an active social life and you’re just inquiring whether she’d like to be a part of it or not. Then she can feel a lot freer to accept.

Timing is Everything

For a woman, there’s a right time and a right place for everything. And the timing of where and when you ask her out can make all the difference between getting a “Yes” and getting a “No”.

If she’s in a hurry or in the middle of doing something – forget it. If she’s looking bored – go for it! If she’s got other people around – wait ‘til later. If she’s alone – do it now. If she’s just going into work or just getting off work – tread carefully. If she’s on a lunch break or in a store shopping – the time is ripe.

Be Specific

Don’t just say, “Let’s go out sometime”. That kind of ambivalence will get you nowhere. Instead, be sure that when you ask a girl out, your proposal includes two key elements:
1. Date
2. Activity

So, for example, you can say, “Would you like to meet me Sunday afternoon for coffee?” or “Are you free Friday night to go out dancing at this great club I know?” You see the difference? So will she.

Now that you know these 3 tips on how to get a date, you’re 3 steps closer to actually getting one. Now go out and try them, because you’ll never know if they work unless you do.