How to Get a Girlfriend

Whether or not you’re currently dating, the factors in how to get a girlfriend are the same. And the most important factor is to reliably and consistently meet her needs. Once you’ve got that squared away, the second most important factor in how to get a girlfriend is to get a life.

Meet Her Needs

Everyone has certain needs that crave being met. How to get a girlfriend, then, involves being conscious of her needs, and meeting them. Fortunately, there are certain needs common to (almost) all women, which gives you an excellent head start and giving her what she wants.

1. Security/Certainty – Every girl wants to feel safe and secure, sure of her world and the man she’s with. If you can help provide her that sense of security and certainty – not so much by “taking care of her” as by being honest, trustworthy, forthright, genuine, and above-all sure of yourself and certain of your safety and security in the world, she can be yours.

2. Excitement/Adventure – Every girl craves adventure. As distinct from “drama”, the type of adventure we’re talking about is playful unpredictability, surprise and spontanaeity, willingness to explore new places and experience new things. That doesn’t mean you have to take her parasailing to win her over, but surprising her with a bouquet of flowers delivered to the office on an ordinary day that’s not a holiday or a special occasion certainly couldn’t hurt.

3. Sensuality/Pleasure – Girls want to feel beautiful. And they want to know that they’re an endless source of turn-on for the guys they’re with. So, while it’s inadvisable to come on too strong, sexually speaking, it actually helps your efforts in how to get a girlfriend if you regularly and frequently find new and innovative ways to express to her and show her how attractive she is to you.

4. Presence/Attention – Most of all, a girl wants to know that when she’s with a guy, he’s with her. Meaning that your mind can’t be elsewhere. When you’re with her, you’ve got to devote 100% of your attention to being with her, in that moment. Putting your attention on her when you’re together is one of the most sure-fire ways to get her to want to be your girlfriend.

Get a Life

This is not meant to be an insult, and it’s certainly no joke. Far too many men are dependent on having a girlfriend to make them happy. Then, when (and if) they ever do get a girlfriend, they put all this unspoken pressure on the girl to make them happy. That’s a sure road to disaster.

Before you can share your life with a girlfriend, you’ve first got to have a life to share. No girl (except another needy, clingy, codependent type, that is) likes a guy whose whole world is her (though the notion is, on the surface, quite romantic).

You need to have your own interests, your own hobbies, your own friends, your own routine. That’s how to get a girlfriend, to be the kind of active, involved, self-defined man who naturally attracts her to want to make him her boyfriend.