More and more women in their 40s are finding themselves single again after years in a relationship. After all, nearly 45% of marriages in the UK end in divorce, not to mention the millions of women who’ve been living with partners only to find the relationship breaks down.
And then you find yourself single, technically middle aged – even if you still feel like a 20 year old – perhaps with a couple of kids in tow. And when the dust has settled, you might find yourself thinking, ‘Who will want me now?’
The answer is loads of people. It’s just a matter of getting out there and finding, well, if not Mr Right, then Mr Right Now.
But that’s easier said than done. Women’s self-esteem after a break up can be at an all time low. A combination of being with the same person for so long, mixed with the fear that the dating world has somehow moved on, can leave you convinced that the only solution is to stay at home, live in your PJs and wait to be eaten alive by your cats.
But a break up doesn’t have to mean a style melt down.
One of the things I noticed, when I started dating again as a single parent was lack of time coupled with a wardrobe full of bold noticeable fashion looks. The man who was going to fall for me was going to have to like the way I wanted to dress…I didn’t have time to shop and I didn’t have time to worry about the way I looked.
And there in lies the secret to great style. Dress for yourself. Not for anyone else. If you feel good in what you’re wearing, you’ll ooze self-confidence. And every man I know agrees, there’s nothing more sexy than a confident woman who accepts and respects her body and dresses to please herself.
Here are my top three tips for that first step back onto the dating scene:
Be comfortable
As tempting as that slinky little number might be, walk away from it. Will you really be comfortable if you’re twitching and tugging at your dress all night? Go for something that you feel at ease in. And you can’t go wrong with a simple black shift dress, with the right accessories.
Or how about this season’s must have – the drape dress. Form fitting and flattering drapery will hide a multitude of sins and you’ll exude an air of relaxed confidence, just add heels.
Sexy yet supportive lingerie
Have a bra fitting first. I just bet you haven’t done it in a while and I predict you will need a tighter band width and a fuller cup…this will give you a much more youthful shape in your clothes – I always say “Get the underwear right and your outerwear will look twice as good”. But don’t stop there treat yourself to something new, like body sculpting underwear to create a firmer and smother silhouette.
I recommend the waist cinchter to give you great definition at your waist and the Spanx dress to smooth out any roles of flesh. Despite what Bridget Jones might have to say, it is possible to have sexy, beautiful-looking underwear that still gives you the support you need.
Know what works for your shape
It might be that your shape has changed since you were last on a date. And what worked for you before just may not work now. Perhaps this is the real scource of your lack of confidence – once you know you can depend on your body to look fantastic you can instantly relax.
First identify your body shape and then dress for your shape by picking the right clothes that will flatter. After all, ageless style never goes out of fashion. Confidence is next to sexiness. And choosing clothes with the right features for your shape and by understanding which necklines to choose, or which shapes will work for you will help.
I believe beautiful comes in all shapes and sizes and that with a little fashion advice, everyone can learn to ‘Love their Shape’. Through experience, I know some people want that helping hand or that little bit of reassurance so we have teamed up with datingadvicesecrets.com to help you dress for your shape and we are giving away a FREE eBook on how to do this to 10 lucky readers. To enter simply visit How To Look Good.
Former fashion editor Caryn Franklin has interviewed everyone from Yves Saint Laurent to Georgio Armani and is a nationally known British fashion expert having had her own TV shows on BBC, ITV, Discovery and UKTV Style networks. Caryn is the patron of Beat a national eating disorders charity and co-chair of Fashion Targets Breast Cancer.
From her website www.howtolookgood.com her e-books help women of all shapes and sizes towards an effortless understanding of how to dress.
Former fashion editor Caryn Franklin has interviewed everyone from Yves Saint Laurent to Georgio Armani and is a nationally known British fashion expert having had her own TV shows on BBC, ITV, Discovery and UKTV Style networks. Caryn is the patron of Beat a national eating disorders charity and co-chair of Fashion Targets Breast Cancer.
From her website www.howtolookgood.com her e-books help women of all shapes and sizes towards an effortless understanding of how to dress.