That’s right. You read correctly. The title of the article is How to Fail at Online Dating.
First, take dating advice from your friend’s cousin about what service to use. She met her boyfriend online and she seems happy. Therefore, it’s probably the best service out there (the fact that she’s ten years older than you and lives in another city is irrelevant).
And since you’re a little embarrassed about the online dating thing and don’t want anyone you know finding out that you’re doing it, don’t post a picture. There’s really no need. Guys will read your profile. You’re sure to get attention because you sound like such a great woman.
And in your profile, be sure to mention that you just got out of an emotionally draining relationship and you’re not sure you’re ready to get into a new relationship. That you’re going to need to take things very slowly. Guys love that.
Alright, enough of me being a smartass.
These represent the three types mistakes that women make as they approach online dating. Let’s break them down:
You must consider location/demographics when looking into which service to use. Match.com might have hundreds of possible matches for women looking for guys in their 20s in the Boston area but only a dozen options for women looking for guys in their 40s living in southern Iowa. Maybe the women in Iowa would have better luck on Eharmony or Plenty of Fish or Chemistry (I’m making this data up, btw. I have no idea how many guys are registered with Match.com in Iowa).
My point is, before you invest in any service, either with your time or money, do a thorough search of the available men in your area. Find out how big the pool is.
You MUST post a picture and it must be a good one (more about how to pick a picture in my next post). Otherwise don’t waste your time. Seriously.
Do not write anything about your past relationships in your profile. Guys don’t want to read about your baggage. Keep it light. Be positive.
Online dating is not hard. Really it’s not. Thousands of people do it successfully every day.
There are no guarantees, but I promise that if you follow these simple dating tips, you’ll have a much better chance of success.
{ 2 comments }
I tend to agree with you Matthew – online dating sites are important for many reasons:
– no time/interest in ‘hanging around in bars’ or Starbucks hoping to meet Mr Right,
– want to speed up meeting people who are a good match,
– too nervous to do the ‘cold intro’, etc)
but these sites most definitely still have short-comings:
– profile picture is often not reliable (a common complaint)
– profile text is basically a ‘sale pitch’, often heavily tuned to attract, more than tuned to reflect the true person
– many men (and women) are ‘players’, either looking for short-term fun, or looking to exploit their good looks (men=sex, women=expensive dates)
– many have become ‘too picky’ and not willing to invest emotionally until they find ‘Mr Perfect’
One piece of the jigsaw (which has been missing until now) is the ability to see reviews from their past dates – imagine being able to look up ‘Bill27 eHarmony’ and see how they dated, based on input from their past online daters.
Obviously, researching a potential date is a given, but there’s actually some real advantages to entering reviews too:
– To Compliment: You just had a great date and would like to tell them, but don’t want to look desperate.
– To Educate: You just had an OK date and may (or may not) date them again, but want to give them some advise on the areas you think they could improve, without the embarrassment of telling them to their face (this can lead to them coming to sites like ‘datingadvisesecrets.com’)
– To Warn (and educate): You had a bad date and want to warn others (profile not accurate, poor dating skills in certain areas, etc)
Anyway, I like your site and would be pleased to cross-link with you (on your request).
ValidDate,
Polite, honest and fair, to help your dates get there…..
I couldn’t have explained it better.
Internet dating is dangerous. It’s always better if you meet the people and get to know them in person. Isn’t it? I guess I am a little bit conservative about this topic. Oldschool lol:)