The first date with a guy is actually set up the first time you meet him.
What I mean by this is that in your early conversations you want to be creating all kinds of different opportunities that makes it easier to suggest a date later on. For example, you drop a hint: “I haven’t been to the zoo in ages. I really want to go!” This makes it easy for him or you to bring it up later, instead of it sounding strange and out of the blue.
A. Contacting him
Some women are terrified of ever contacting a guy first; but it’s okay to initiate things. Just don’t overwhelm someone with essay-long texts everyday.
No more bland texts e.g. “Hey, I’m so bored, what u up to?”
- This is dull and value seeking. Better to tell him something interesting you found out related to a conversation you had earlier, or just send him a one off text about a place you talked about.
Don’t be afraid to send texts that just make statements
e.g. “I just realized who you remind me of…” then tell him anyone you like, as long as you can relate it to his personality or looks (even if it’s a Harry Potter character, or an actor, or a cartoon character). Texts like this build intrigue without saying too much.
So if he asks you why he reminds you of that person, you can just say something like “Because of his cheeky smile”.
Use texts to arrange quick dates
- Remember, you can arrange low-pressure dates on your terms e.g. “Hey, I’m gonna go check out (x) today with some friends. You should come along if you’re about…. x”. If he can’t make it, he’ll re-arrange to do something else.
B. The first date and beyond
A couple of quick rules for first dates: No more talking about insecurities/past relationships
Think “why” instead of “what”
- In other words, go into more interesting areas of conversation. If he has a piercing, ask him why he got it. If he tells you he likes tennis, ask him if it’s because he prefers solo sports rather than team games. Ask him about his dream job and why he would love to do it.
Future, not past
- The more excitedly you talk about your future and plans; the more he’s going to want to be a part of that future.
Get him talking about what he really loves
- Get into each other’s passions. It will make for much more exciting conversation and he’ll feel closer to you afterwards.
I hope you enjoyed this article and were able to take something away from it. If you want to learn about dating guys and attraction on a whole deeper level then check out our ebook over at Get The Guy.
To your love life,